This post is all about how to discover who you are.

The most important thing you can invest time in is in discovering who you are. Why?

Because it allows you to avoid the constant frustration of not knowing where are you going and what are you doing in life. It allows you to stop wasting time on the wrong things and start spending them on the things that make a difference and matter to you.

Knowing yourself has a lot of benefits, starting with better self-confidence and ending with the most impactful one in my opinion, and that is that discovering who you are is the first step in the right direction to living a meaningful, abundant, and fulfilling life. And tell me is there anything better than that?

Aside from these benefits, taking the time to discover who you are will help you understand your purpose and what to do with your life as well as allow you to make a bigger impact on the world and others people’s lives.

So without further due let’s to the thick of the matter and learn the 4 steps you need to take to discover who you are!

4 Steps to discover who you truly are

Don´t confuse getting to know your true self with who you want to be

Although discovering who you want to be and what your highest self looks like is highly important in life and an essential step in any personal development plan, right now we are focusing on discovering who you truly are, in every aspect of your life including the good and the bad.

By doing this you are establishing your starting point: your talents, your values, what type of things matter to you, the things that trigger you, your purpose… Because when you finally know who you are, you will see where you are and your talents fit in the bigger picture.

Discover your core values

Values are the things that you believe are important in the way you live your life. They are the fundamental beliefs that guide your actions and determine your priorities. Values are the terms with which you determine if your life feels full, abundant, accomplished, and happy. 

And inside your values, you have your core value, which are the ones that define your biggest priority in life, the ones that when you say it out loud makes you vibrate with emotion.

What I love the most about core values is that they become this incredibly powerful tool once you discover and understand yours.

They are quite literally a life compass because values are the representation of what truly matters to you in life, about what you stand for, what moves you, and finally what makes you feel happy and fulfilled.

Discovering your core values can also come in handy when establishing and respecting boundaries, as they give you an idea of where is your limit, of what you are willing to withstand while respecting yourself.

Another benefit of discovering your core values is the improvement of your decision-making skills. But how can we use values to make better and wiser decisions?

By for example every time you have to make a decision but you find yourself doubting, you simply have to internally ask: “Does this choice support my values and what I stand for? Does this decision support the essence of my true self?

So now that you know what are values and how powerful they are, you might be wondering how can I discover my values and core values?

You can discover yours by following these 4 simple steps:

1. Write your values

Review the list of examples of core values linked below and select and write down every value that resonates with you as well as the values that most accurately describe your feelings or behaviors. Add any you think of that are not on the list as well. 

A little tip that has really helped me in this step and that I highly recommend is to read the words out loud and feel what emotion they evoked in me.

Here is a list of 100 values worth checking out to find out yours!

2. Categorize values into related groups

Now you have a master list of your values, so the next step is to review the list and see if you can group the values into categories. So for example, you may have written down growth, learning, and personal development. These values are all related and could be placed in one category. 

3. Identify the central theme of your groups

Once you have categorized your values, choose a word (within that group) that best represents each group. You can leave the other words in the group in parentheses next to the central theme word to give the primary value more context.

So continuing with the example mentioned above, let´s say I have a group of values which are growth, learning, and personal development. And I decide that the one I resonate most with is personal growth. 

Then that list would go from- learning, personal development, and growth to “Value: personal development (learning, growth)”.

4. Choose your core values

Now that you have your values chosen and grouped, it´s time to rank the top values in order of importance. While the number of core values people have can vary, try to choose between 3 to 5 core values.

If you have more than 5, ask yourself what values are essential to your life. And remember, in this list, the order has a meaning so make sure to list your values in order from your most meaningful to your least meaningful ones.

Ask for feedback

Sometimes those closest to us can see something we might not be able to see and they can provide insight about ourselves that we might be oblivious to. It doesn’t have to be a long and exhaustive questionnaire on “who do you think I am?”. 

But by simply asking the people closest to you these two questions: “What strengths do you think I need to develop further?” and ” What weakness do you think I need to work on?”, will give you enough information about yourself and even help you start with your personal development journey.

Want to know the 5 essential areas you must work on during your personal development journey?

Obviously, their answer will not be perfect, and sometimes, as you can learn thanks to the mirror law, people often project on others what they see in themselves, whether it’s good or bad. So trust your intuition and don´t accept everything at first, and keep only what resonates with you.

Asking the really hard questions

Discovering who you truly are is about going on a search, a search about you, about what you like and what you don´t, your purpose, your goals in life, your passions, your beliefs…

Now, discovering some of these things will be a matter of trial and error, but most of them you´ll discover through reflection and by asking yourself the hard questions (and answering honestly).

For example: “If you could do anything, and time and money weren´t an issue, what would you do? or “We are always talking about the things we don´t like (about ourselves, about the world we live in…) and should change, so why haven’t you?”

We are so used to the busy and constantly demanding world we live in, where our minds and thoughts are scattered over a thousend different things- what is for dinner, I need to finish these things for work/school, the weather today is terrible, the problems and challenges we are currently facing, etc.

We scarcely take the time to digest and reflect on what is going on in our lives, with ourselves, on the day´s events. We simply gobble them up without processing them.

But one of the most essential steps when wanting to self-improve or even get to know ourselves is to analyze, reflect and review, to actively think about who we are.

So how can I do this: by slowing down, analyzing, and writing our thoughts. This way will gain clarity over our lives and ourselves (including everything that entitles).

Here you can find a couple of hard questions you can start answering to discover who you are:

• What is the aspect of my life I am proud of?
• What would I do if I won a billion dollars today?
• What do I care most about society and the world?
• What is the one thing that I would pursue no matter what?
• What are my best qualities?
• Do I know my purpose?
• Do I have a motto? What is it and why?
• What are my favorite quotes to live by?
• Why are these quotes important to me and how do they help me?
• What are my passions?
• Am I happy overall?
• How would I describe a perfect day?
• Do I love the skin I am in?
• How do I describe my best life?
• Am I living my best life?
• If not, what is holding me back?
• How do I get what I need?
• What are my fears?
• What are my greatest life lessons?
• Do I use these lessons to improve myself?
• What negative behaviors or habits do I want to remove?
• How have I grown in the past year?
• What hurts me most about my past?
• What have been my biggest mistakes
• What are my inspirations?

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When you take the time to discover and understand who you are, your purpose will become bigger than your fears, you will spend less time spinning your wheels and more time focusing on developing yourself, your strengths, your talents, your passion, as well as the areas of your life that will help you achieve a successful and meaningful life.

Thank you so much for investing your time in this article. I hope the tools, tips, and steps here will help you to get to know yourself and take the first step toward your dream life!